My Best Advice for New Moms (or any mom, really)

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I’m far from a pro at this whole mom thing. I work hard for my kids, do my research to make the best decisions possible for our family and now that I’m a mom of two, I guess I can say I’m at least a little bit of a pro… or at least more than I was the first time around.

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Here’s the thing — I truly believe that the majority of moms in this world are good at what they do. We’re good at being moms. [Of course there are always going to be exceptions to the rule.]

You’re good at being a mom. In fact, you’re great at what you do. But do you truly believe that?

Let me ask you this —

Do you believe you are great at being a mom?

We second guess our decisions, we compare what we’re doing to other moms around us, we look at other kids to see if our kids are reaching milestones at the same speed as they are and every single day of our lives, we make choices for our kids. In fact, every single hour and minute and even second we are making decisions for our kids.

Should I start preschool now or in six months? What does research tell me is “best”? Should I start my kids in lots of organized activities from a young age or just let them play until they’re a bit older? Should they sleep in their own room? A bassinet or a crib? Their own room or in the same room as a sibling? Should I start solids at 4 months or 6 months?

So many questions and decisions and so much “research” out there that “proves” the correct way to be one way or the other. But you know what? You can probably find “proven research” for just about every point of view but the only research you need is that of your own heart.

You are their mom and you know what is best for you, for them, and for your family. You and only you have their best interests in mind and that is what matters the most.

Oh the debate endless debate over breastfeeding, bottle feeding + formula feeding.

Have you ever asked another adult what they were fed when they were babies? Is it something you have to answer on college applications? Or on your resume? Do you even know what you were fed when you were a baby?

Some moms have adopted and don’t have breastmilk for their kids. Some moms have milk that just doesn’t come in strong. Some moms have babies in the NICU that must be formula fed for whatever reason. Some moms aren’t physically able to breastfeed. Some moms want so badly to breastfeed but due to a lack of supply, pain, a child that doesn’t latch — this stress (at least in my eyes) is just not worth it. Happy moms = happy kids and only you can make that decision for yourself and for your kids. And remember this — the decision you are making is the best decision.

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SO MY BEST ADVICE FOR NEW MOMS?

YOU DO YOU. AND OWN IT.

Make decisions you feel are best for your kids, stick with those decisions and stand by those decisions. Being confident in the decisions you’re making will not only make you a more confident mom (which your kids will absolutely notice), but will make you happier and healthier, thus enabling you to raise happier and healthier kids while you’re at it — a lifelong snowball effect.